Oct 31, 2008

clandestine costumed cross

last night was clandestine cross night. or, as it is now known around here, the thursday night throwdown. halloween style. we met on the back nine, aka the beach, aka superfan territory of our beloved usgp course. there was a lot of milling about and drinking beer and laughing and taking of pictures while satan marked our course. and then with an announcement of the rules - which mostly involved beer laps and bell laps and some other stuff i don't remember, we were off on a preview, warm up lap. the course even had a little haunted shed with a glo-stick hanging from the ceiling. after the preview and once the sun was fully set and it was pitch black out save for all the lights on bikes and helmets - we raced. and race is a very strong word for me. mostly raggedy ann and i were out for a scary pitch black sunday ride and called it quits after one lap. thought it might be best to cheer from the beer cooler.

but the others did indeed race, and it is best summed up by our fearless leader, satan himself:(this may be one of those things that is only funny if you were there. in costume. riding around the cross course at night. drinking. and knew all these people i am talking about.) but here goes:

Ripping through the inky autumn darkness with what many called "spooky speed and surprisingly perky falsies", Dr. Bill C outgunned (and out-shotgunned) the competition to snag the win at the innagural Halloween Throwdown. Team Louisville's own Chris "the heavy-hitter" stayed close to the top spot for most of the race, but a critical beer-lap error cost him the win (he chose a bottle vs a can). Opting for raw power over malted barly, Aaron tried to hold on to his early race lead, but his impressive 5.5 minute lap time was no match for the 15 second free-lap guzzle-fest that ultimately decided first and second place. The chase group - led by D.L. "funny femur" Hauber - kept the pressure on for most of the race, but by lap three, many racers started dropping out - lured away by the promise of fizzy goodness and the sexy tri-fecta of Naughty Night Nurse Betty, Ravishing Raggedy Ann and Savory Swiss Miss. (can I get a yodel?) RJ "Ricola" Harris set a blistering pace early on, but an authentic-woolen-leiderhosen malfunction caused some unanticipated chafing and he was taken to the medical tent. He appeared to be recovering well after 1000cc's of brownwater and by the end of the race was seen chatting with reporters. Evel Kennevil took a break from jumping buses and chose instead to come out and jump sand traps and Santa decided to get one more race in before the big holiday push. Joe the plumber came by - still fired up from the Go Sarah!! rally in Jeff the night before - and Boosty Collins scorched the course before rolling back to the beach area to drop some base lines. Back at the beach, Varsity wrestling champ, Steven "the package" Webster kept things interesting in his UK-Blue uni-tard and Mac "Spartan-not-Trojan" Shwab peppered passing racers with lively commentary and good old-fashioned cheers.

the fact that no one is actually riding bikes in the photos below is not lost on me. i realize that. but there was riding. really. there was.

8 comments:

Judi said...

OMG looks sooooo fun!

pamster said...

I'm speechless.........and shopping for a cross bike. That type of "riding" is so up my alley.

Laurel said...

What fun! And you look adorable!

chris said...

you are all lucky that "i couldn't find my speedo".

bsegal said...

Yes Chris, yes we are. I hereby dub you, the water boy for your post race performance.

Groover said...

Looks like a good time was had by all. Racing or not. :-)

Vickie said...

You'd look good as a blonde!

pricklypearbloom said...

There's alot of Harris's in Louisville.

This is all funny to me, perhaps because drinking and funny costumes are always funny, or perhaps because I once thought seriously about joining the Madison Hashers.