i worry.

so i come back from this mornings' big dog run, which was hard -
but not as hard as last week.
but still. it was hard.
i enter the workout into my spreadsheet thingy,
and see the pace i was running and in an instant -
panic is sitting right next to me.
with a cup of coffee & a smug look on his face.
and he says, if it was that hard, how on earth are you going to maintain that for 26.2 miles?
and i listened to him.

and i go into the kitchen and say to my husband,
" i worry because" ... and i rattle off a long and breathless list and banal detail about paces,heartrates, great runs vs. bad, the sunday long runs that feel great & like i can run forever vs. the big dog runs at near marathon pace that are currently kicking my butt

and when i'm done, he says:
you could have just stopped at "i worry".

and he rattles off a list of all the perfectly valid reasons for the good sunday runs & the tough thursday runs ... the very same reasons my coach emailed back to me later in the day

shit. i didn't think panic would stop by for a visit this early.