it's all coming together

the workout i have been dreading for the past four weeks came & went -
i can worry about things crazy far in advance. its a gift.
today was six mile repeats.
that would be six. six shit fast miles.
with 4 minute recoveries in between.
did i say 6? it bears repeating: six. mile. repeats.

i kicked the shit out of them.
ok, i kicked the shit out of 5 of them. all in target zone.
dead on in target zone.
number 4 got away from me ... don't know how, it just did.

coach had suggested that i look at each mile as a separate event. this is nothing short of genius. a pure stroke of coachy brilliance. looking at each one individually is a much, much easier pill to swallow. six little pills. not one big bitter horse pill. i didn't worry about how many i had left. i didn't compare each lap to the one before. each mile was a single mile. all on its' own. and in a pay it forward sort of way, if you don't already do this, i highly recommend it. mile repeats: each mile is a single, and separate event. trust me. its genius.

there were no mantras this morning of idontwanttodothis.
there was no pacing nervous circles.
i didn't think about how much it hurt. and in fact - it didn't. at all.
there was just one thought: get this done. get. each. one. done.
mind was blank.
legs on auto pilot.

laps 1,2,3 7:15/7:16/7:17
lap 4 i don't know what happened 7:25
but i got it all back again
lap 5 & 6 7:18 / 7:17

followed by holyshitholyshitholyshit.
and some very happy, satisfied, i cannot believe i did it tears.
i did it. its done. and because its my blog i can brag - i kicked ass.
one mile at a time.

in previous weeks i'd hit the first 3 & then it would start to fall apart. i'd get further & further away from target pace with each passing lap. i've seen those numbers up there before, but have never seen them this consistent. this close to each other. and certainly never gotten faster in the last two laps - never got it back like that. once it was gone, it was gone.

i feel like its all coming together now. amazing how that works. i remember this place last year. that sudden realization that if you work your ass off for months and weeks on end, the training works. it does what its' supposed to do. i'm in a good place this week. the workouts are not killing me. i don't need naps after the big days. i could run forever on my long run days. now, to hang on to this feeling. to keep it up. there's still more. 32 days more to be exact. 32 more days to hope that it all comes together enough to translate into 3:45 on october 21st.