Jul 4, 2008

i.d. please

so i am at kroger.
its the 4th of july.
we need beer.
its' an emergency situation.
i'm in the checkout line with
burger buns, corn and beer.
hello. a cookout in the making.
in the aftermath of what was a cluster
of a bike ride with my husband,
that kept us out a lot longer than we meant to be out;
i'm still in my bike shorts, top & cycling gloves.
i just grabbed my check card & keys and ran out the door.
as she scans the beer,
she says may i see your id?
and, if i actually had my id on me,
i would have been so totally i-am-nearly
40 flattered & would have been chatty and nice.
but i didn't have it on me.
so instead,
i went on a tiny tirade.
oh. you're not serious.
she was.
i don't have it on me.
i just ran out of the house.
please?
oh come on.
i'll be 40 in november
i have three kids.
please!
oh come on!
you have got to be kidding me.
i want that beer.
no joy.
so, as i stand in the kroger line beer-less,
i am just hoping i see someone i know
so they can buy beer for me.
but i figured everyone i knew was at home
cooking out.
having a beer.

8 comments:

house on hill road said...

ha! did you go back?

m said...

and so?.....what happened? : )

See Zanne Run said...

well first, i stood there for a while; dejected & beerless without a friend in the world to hook me up - and seeing as i am way too lazy to go home, get id & go back again, i walked across the parking lot to CVS where i prayed the guy would recognize me from my weekly forays in there to stock up on the $3.33 bottles of cabernet (the $5.99 fish eye bottles when i was feeling really splurgy) ... i brazenly plunked down a couple of six packs (and a token bottle of wine figuring that would be the 'trigger of remembrance' - i was going for that: ah yes, you're the chick who always buys the cheap shit wine recognition) ... he looked at me, i smiled a big one & held my breath ... and a swipe of my check card later, i was on my merry- nearly-40-year-old-beer-in-hand way. beer-less crisis averted.

Sunshine said...

The last time I had to produce an ID, the waitress got real abusive with me, saying, Well, yes, she could see I was WAY over 21.
Why does this have to be such an unpleasant experience.
Glad you found an end run around.

BettyBetty said...

That is too funny!

caroline said...

That is WAY funny! Why didn't you just have her call the manager over? These kids are following orders, and not even THINKING about variables. Kindof like Henry making me stand on the stoop because you weren't home. "Don't let anybody in." "Always check for i.d." Why aren't they ALWAYS this directed?!? HA!

Gotta Run said...

I call people like that "fun-suckers"

Thank god for CVS... lol!! Fish Eye wine makes my head yell ugly things.

Vegan Run Amok said...

I recently got carded at the health food store and was feeling all flattered until the next time I went and they carded some guy in front of me who was clearly in at least his 60s. Apparently they card everyone now. Oh, well.

I'm glad you got your beer! (CVS sells beer???)