worst case scenario

is that i have a pelvic stress fracture.
but that's the worst case scenario.
best case is that its' the same old hip flexor pain from last year, or an adductor strain.
in the meantime, i've been benched.
for a week.
no running for a week.
i just wanted to cry.

spent almost an hour at physical therapy today ...
i had the massage, i got wrenched into a pretzel to try & snap hip back into place ... apparently, i'm not a "popper" - she never gets to hear that satisfying pop that lets her know all is where it should be. she does a visual measuring thing ... lines my legs up & looks at ankles ... i was way off - a whole thumb. whatever that means. to me - it just means OUCH.

after the pretzel twisting comes the yanking part ... i lie on my back, hold on to the top of the table, take a deep breath in (all the while she's swinging my leg back & forth) - let it out & YANK. i guess its the modern version of being stretched on a rack. then another visual measure of ankle bones & hip bones ... and it worked!

its all straight. but we've been here before -- the trick is keeping it all straight.

all of these issues are due to the fact that my left hip rotates back, thus bringing my left leg up; making it shorter than my right leg. the pain that ensues is this: it hurts to pick my left leg up & move it forward, then my thigh hurts when it hits the ground. think about that. its' basically every move a leg has to do to go forward. hurts.

there is a spot that is particularly tender ... (and now we are getting entirley too personal, so i'll just leave it there) ... and when i say particulary tender - i mean, if you touch it - nay, breathe on it - i could jump through the roof it hurts so much. hip flexor strain would have been further up - and when she actually touched my hip flexor - it was fine ... she asked if it hurt while at rest & sadly, as of last night (when i was lying in bed - thinking f*#k - why is this hurting when i am not even moving?) - the answer was yes. That coupled with the fact that it hurts on impact to the ground and my mid thigh - (that would be my screaming quads) has her now thinking that there's a chance it could be a pelvic stress fracture.

so ... i have a lift thingy in the heel of my shoe. i am wearing some sort of crazy patch with a + and - sign on it. is it a battery? a magnet? i don't know ... just better make me better.

i am going back on wednesday. and likely friday. if it is not better - i.e. pain free by friday, i am looking at xrays & bone scans. oy vey. this can't be good. i really really really want to run a marathon in 159 days. but now is the time to be really smart & take care of myself ... i have got to get this fixed. will do everything i need to do. including not run.

but i can bike, swim & do yoga. thank god for that. we have a crazy week ahead with all kinds of school activities & lunch rides are going to be tough to squeeze in. but, serendipitously, we have houseguests all week & so i have already warned my husband that he'll be rising with me at 4:30 am to be out the door on our bikes at 5 ... we can get a nice 2 hour ride in before we've got to get kids on bus.

this is already day 4 of no running. 4 more loom ahead. there's an opportunity here, right? ... a chance to build on my biking skills ... i never want to give up a run to work on something else - but now that i have no choice ... i'll go with it.

... in the meantime, i'll be practicing the art of patience.